image via Pinterest

Grace.  My word for 2014.  I post a lot of photos on facebook and instagram…we have happy times and we are all enjoying our sweet little Beckham while he is so little.  What you don’t see in those happy photos is a mother seriously struggling…

There aren’t many moments of personal time when you have four kids under five.  Between nursing every three hours, I’m scrambling to feed the girls, get them dressed, get them to school, spend quality time with them, and discipline consistently.  Those are just the important necessities that I sometimes struggle to accomplish these days.  The laundry, cleaning, working out, making myself a meal, reading a book, chatting with friends, checking my email/facebook….those are the tasks and luxuries that get the back burner…they happen IF I have the time.  I’ve had to say “no” to many things I would love to do.  I have made people upset because I’ve said no.  I have been beating myself up over not being able to get everything done.  I’ve worried to much about what people think. I’ve been frustrated, stressed and sad…because I’m trying to hold myself to such a high standard.  All because I’m trying to attain perfection.

There are so many things that I WANT to do.  I feel limited because right now in this season, we can’t get out very much.  I want to build relationships with friends, I want to read more books, I want to start my little cupcake business up again, I want to start running again…BUT I have to also realize the amazing responsibility that God has given me by entrusting me with four sweet and beautiful children.  I will have time for those things when this short season is over.  Right now, my greatest responsibility is right here in my home.  The kids will only be this little for such a short time. I want to embrace this season with JOY.  I want to give grace…to my children, to others, and to myself  just as God has so freely given to me time and time again.

 “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.”
2 cor 12:9

One day I’ll have more time for “me”….and I know I will be so sad that I don’t have three girls asking me hundreds of questions a day, a baby boy who insists on holding my hand when he nurses, and four little children who need their mommy every minute of the day.  All those things that are important to me can wait. I want to soak this time in and remember these moments, as difficult as they can be at times…because God has blessed me with SO much and I don’t want to miss out on the joy that comes with this sweet little season of life!


7 thoughts on “Grace

  1. I stumbled across your blog a few weeks ago due to mutual friends and recognized you from Beta Chi. This post was encouraging to me as I feel exactly the same most days, and it really does help to know other moms are in the same boat and struggling with the same things. I’ve always felt like I had it all together, but adding another baby, moving to a new area, renovating a home, etc. within the last year has frazzled me! Thank you for the reminder you set before me that we are tasked and blessed with an amazing job of raising these little ones for our Lord. You’re not alone for sure and it certainly looks like you’re doing a wonderful job.

    1. Erin – thank you so much for finding my blog – were you in Beta Chi too? I’m so thankful it was an encouragement to you – i’m always thankful when what I share can be an encouragement to others going through the same thing! It seems like you have gone through a LOT in the last year! It’s nice to “meet” you. 🙂 I appreciate your encouragement so much!!!

      1. Yes, I was there 2000-2004. My last name was Greemann back then. I think we met a few times and had some mutual friends and I rarely forget a face, so I recognized you on here. I’ve enjoyed your posts recently and can sympathize with you on many fronts…except I only have 2 crazies running around, so I can only imagine 4! Hang in there! I hear it goes by way too quickly, and we will want these blurry days back. 🙂

      2. Yes I remember you Erin! 🙂 We were freshman together! It’s so fun to be reconnected with so many people through social media! Thank you for the encouragement – I hear it goes by quickly too…it sure does…I can’t believe it’s been 10 years since we graduated from college! 😉

  2. Well, I’m honored that I am remembered. 🙂 Yes, I cringed when I got the 10 year class reunion info in the mail. Yikes! Hope you guys got through another week in one piece. Your schedule made me tired just looking at it!

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